How much time do you think you’ve wasted over the course of your life replaying an awkward encounter, or a subpar presentation, or some negative feedback that you received in your head?
Probably a lot.
Society tells us that we need to be perfect in order to be acceptable and accepted, so it’s no wonder we do this to ourselves.
But perfectionism slows us down.
We waste time thinking about all of the ways that we were wrong and beating ourselves up instead of learning from the experience and moving on with even better information.
When we allow ourselves to be real, we get to just keep going.
Keep moving towards our goals.
We can un-learn perfectionism and allow ourselves to show up whole.
If you’re ready to stop letting perfectionism hold you back from creating what you want in life, let’s talk.
During the call we’ll untangle the thoughts that are getting in your way of going after what you want.
Ever think to yourself “I should have this figured out by now”.⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
We can solve wildly complex technical problems, but we can’t speak up in meetings. Or we can’t make our relationships work. Or we still depend on others to tell us how amazing we are instead of feeling confident. ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
We’re so smart, but we also beat ourselves up when we have a hard time with something.⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
You try to make the change from trying ALL THE THINGS. Doing every new strategy. And when they don’t work, you end up frustrated and right back where you started.⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
And I want to offer that nothing has gone wrong here. ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
You shouldn’t have it figured out. Because you haven’t yet learned how to intentionally evaluate the circumstances and create the result that you want with your mind.⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
You trained your mind for years to be able to solve those technical issues. You are fully resourced with education and support structures.⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
What would it look like if you put the same purposefulness behind the rest of your goals. To train your mind to get what you came for.⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
Where would you be in 3 months?⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
If you want to find out where you could be with three months of intentional work applied to your goals, let’s talk.⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
Book your free consultation here.⠀⠀
On the call we’ll identify the places that you’re getting tripped up and lay out a clear path that will get you the results you want.⠀
After I had kids, I remember feeling like my body had betrayed me.
I was physically someone I didn’t recognize.
My childbirths didn’t go to plan (and you know I had a 7 page birthing plan written out…and it definitely did not go down like that).
I had put on over 50 pounds with each pregnancy.
Breastfeeding was not making the weight come off.
Movement felt excruciating. I didn’t want to jump or run, I was just too uncomfortable. This was so hard for me, since I had been extremely active before.
In addition to my own thoughts about my body, as women, especially as women in male-dominated technical fields, we constantly get either subtle (or explicit) messaging that our bodies are wrong. Or unwelcome. That even existing in a women’s body is inconvenient.
I didn’t realize at the time that by thinking that my body had betrayed me, I was creating a rift that was causing the exact results that I didn’t want.
I can’t erase the messaging that society puts out there, but once I see it I can then make a conscious choice as to how I want to react.
Same with my own thoughts. Once I make them conscious, I was able to then choose thoughts that did produce the results that I wanted, which was to have a loving relationship with my own body.
Your body is always on your side. No matter what. Your body is a source of knowledge and wisdom. And you can choose thoughts that honor that.
If you’re ready to learn how to evaluate systems and use your mind to create the results that you want, let’s work together. Next step is to message me to book your free consultation. On the call we’ll see what those thoughts are that are holding you back, and create a clear path to get you to where you want to go.
I was talking to a woman the other day who had just applied for a dream job at a startup. She wanted so badly to be a product manager, and here was her opportunity to go for it.⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
As she was finding out more and more details about the position, she started to get nervous.⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
She would be the first woman hired by the company. The first product manager. The first remote hire.⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
The rest of the team put in ridiculously long hours, and she thought she’d have to do the same.⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
But she has a family.⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
Two small kids who she wants to be there for.⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
And all she could think about was how she wouldn’t be able to make this work, even though this role would be ideal.⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
She saw all the ways that this could go wrong, that it would be hard, that she wouldn’t get to be the mom that she wanted to be if she took this role.⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
This is normal. Our brains are built to look for all the ways that things that could go wrong so that we stay safe.⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
But I saw opportunity. Possibility.⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
What if the reasons you think you can’t do it are the exact reasons that you are the perfect person to do it?⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
I saw a chance to redefine what it means to be a woman in tech at a startup.⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
I saw a chance for a mom to show her kids what it looks like to go after a dream job and professional satisfaction.⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
I saw a possibility to shift women’s thinking about what it means to be a mom in a high-profile role in tech.⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
We don’t have to settle. We can demand the challenging positions, more pay, AND be the woman, mom, partner, person that we want to be.⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
We can do this from a managed mind that we’ve trained to look for the opportunities along with acknowledging and planning for the risks. From there, we can take action on our dreams and get everything that we came for.⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
If you’re ready to build the confidence to go after your dreams, the next step is to book your free consultation here.
We literally need to question everything.
There are systems at play in our culture that will impact our experience in this world.
Patriarchy, sexism, capitalism, white supremacy, colonialism, all of these are real and have real consequences.
And they’re not only real out there, they’re also in our own minds. We’ve internalized the massaging. The call is coming from inside the house.
So we need to question our own thoughts, our beliefs, the rules that we have for ourselves, how we think we need to show up.
Who really made those rules?
Who’s thoughts are those?
Who benefits when we believe those things?
If you’re ready to examine your beliefs and restructure your thinking so that you can achieve all those goals you’ve set for yourself, let’s talk.
My philosophy on coaching women in STEM is that we must take a multi-pronged approach and use all of the tools in our toolbox so that we can create a life that feels as good to live as it looks on paper.
Our lives are nuanced and we must often sit with the paradox that naturally exists in so many aspects of our lives.
We are structure and flow. Straight line and spiral. Tough and flexible.
Our coaching practice needs to reflect that nuance and embrace the paradox.
So when we work together, we’ll use all of the strategy, all of the tools.
We’ll use thought work and evaluate systems of oppression.
We’ll ask ourselves where we’ve been complicit, obedient. But we’ll be gentle with ourselves and not shame or judge.
We’ll use logic and intuition.
Analysis and embodiment.
We’ll have our sitting practice along with our rewilding.
We can be both engineer and witch.
And we’ll do all of this so we can show up whole and be an example of what’s possible.
The world is waiting for us. Let’s show them who we are and what we’re capable of.
If you’re ready to do this work, the next step is to book your free consultation. Sign up for your time here.